What We Used To Know

"COMMON SENSE IS THE MOST UNCOMMON SENSE OF ALL"

I must have missed the memo. Somewhere along the line, it became acceptable to be totally self-centered. It became ok to not hold doors open, to say “please” or “thank you”, to answer the phone with “whatta ya want” rather than “hello”, to forget about common courtesy. And this is just the tip of the iceberg. We could talk about the disrespectful ways that kids talk to parents and the way some parents respond back (my favorite is I’m gonna beat your a** when we get home).

What, it’s not ok? So I didn’t miss the memo or misread it. But if it isn’t ok, why is it happening more and more. Let’s take a look at 2 specific examples and see where the solution could be.

Two people are walking side by side down the street. Each is engrossed in their own little world due to the magic of wireless communication. Their gestures become grander and more animated as their volume rises and the tone of their voice grows confrontational. They bump into each other and exchange angry looks, since each believes the other to be rude and not paying attention to the surroundings. They try to eavesdrop on the argument the other is having on the phone, while conducting one themselves, and getting ready to start a new one. Because you are “getting in my business” while on a public street, yelling and carrying on.

Does this seem familiar? You can have this experience EVERY DAY, in the parking lot, in the malls, walking down the street. It doesn’t matter where, because it’s everywhere. This is such a total lack of common sense and common courtesy that it would be funny if it wasn’t tragic. The common sense part is easy to see. If you don’t want people in YOUR business, don’t discuss it over the phone where people can HEAR you. Find a quiet spot where you can sit down and talk. And just because the phone rings, doesn’t mean we have to drop everything and answer it.

When you’re checking out and the cashier is on their private phone, talking and not paying attention to you, the customer, you have a right to be upset. I see people leave shopping carts full of merchandise and walk out when they are treated rudely. The cashier always says it was “an important call” and they “had to take it”. But you are being paid to provide a service. Phones have this wonderful feature known as voice mail. This way you can return the call at your convenience and not inconvenience others with your selfish behavior.

The examples of a lack of common courtesy are just as numerous. Flailing your arms, knocking into people, talking loudly and aggressively in a crowd by acting with an over blown sense of self importance, inappropriate language, and a general disregard for others are apparent for others to experience.

Then there is my personal favorite example of inappropriate behaviors, elevators and bus stops. In each case you have one group of people, who are in a small, confined area trying to get out. There is a second group, who are trying to get into said small space. Common sense should tell you that people have to get out before you can get in, right. Then why do people crowd around the doorway, preventing people from exiting? Common courtesy should tell you to back up, out of the way, so there will be room.

It boils down to manners. The decline in interactive skills is due to the changing nature of our lifestyles. We are becoming more solitary, spending less time developing new relationships with our neighbors, while finding new excuses went we haven’t called our BFF in two years. As we stop interacting with people, we forget the little things and thus, our interaction suffers.